What?

Wow, someone just asked me if I like anyone.
Sure, I like everyone.
But in a 'like like' (haha, how mature) kindof way, no I don't like anyone.
Anywho,
So this friend who just asked me who I like alost asked me if he thought he should play AFL next year (a sudden typing error just made me realise AFL is an anagram for ALF. Haha, my new nickname for gayFL has arrived!!) anywho, I said I it's not a good idea, based entirely on the fact I don't really like AFL because I've never been exposed to it. But really, if you want to do something, go ahead and do it.
This though, coming from the girl who was stopped by mere parents from ridding herself of hair. Regretable doesn't even cover it.

Hey, you, there, yes, you if you're reading this; 831. <3. Hahahaha, yes, I do!
Farewell.

Click.

I'm clicking my pen.
I'm one of those annoying people who click pens because a) they like the sound and often make a tune out of clicks, and b) enjoy the fact that it really annoys people. Once, last year, I think, I sat English tapping my pen against the table, constantly, just to see if the teacher would say something. He didn't, to my dismay, one of my friends behind me did. So impatient my friends are. But, I'm sure said teacher was getting irritated. Almost as irritated as myself, because he was droning on when nobody really cared. Sort of like now I guess.

I wrote heaps today. I love writing, putting pen to paper, using MY hand to make something happen, a letter, a symbol, a clique love heart drawn by thousands of girls over thousands of diaries, books, and desks. I love the scrawl, the scribble, and the flow of writing, it's not like typing, where you press different keys, which, unless you're like myself and type freakishly fast, there isn't a flow like there is with a pen. It's, a bit like magic.

Here's a photo I took; thought I'd just put it out there.

This, is space they cannot touch.

Spending time with a loved one is awesome. When you're comfortable with people, it's like, you're just 100% pure you. It's not like you have to pretend that you're cooler than you are, that you're smarter than you are, because these loved ones, these people, see through that, they know better, they know you, and clearly, they've accepted it. Why else would they stick around?

I think it's important not to hide things from people. Honesty really is the best policy and, if you can't be honest with someone, why are you even around them? What gives you the right as a friend, a lover, etc, to say 'well I'm not going to tell them the truth, because the truth hurts,' and to delude yourself into thinking that someone is better off not knowing what's going, leaving them in confusion when the truth is at last found out. Would you like being in the dark? Why base a relationship on lies and untruths? Why tell someone that you rock at cooking, when really, you'd burn water. Where is that going to get you? Having to explain it in the future. Honesty is the best policy. Which is why, when you're around those you trust completely, you don't have to lie, it's liberating.

I don't know, I just put alot of faith and trust into the people I call my friends. They make me who I am. I'm just putting it in writing how disappointed I'd be if my friends were all about deceit and fasçades.
<3 Over and out.

If I only had a brain.

Sometimes I wish I could just flick forward or back time. I wish I could change what's happened and create another pathway to take and leave the crap one behind; but then I remember, everything happens for a reason. It's not like by saving John Lennon from being killed is a bad thing, it's like, changing words said or things done won't stop you from being hurt, heart-broken, whatever, eventually. Everything happens for a reason; fate exsists.

The decisions we make today change what will happen tomorrow. Think about the last thing you said to a friend, a collegue, your mum, and consider, 'if I'da said this, instead of that, what would change? If you want to tell someone that you love them, but don't, and walk away, think 'What if this is the last thing I ever say to them?' I'll tell you why we don't say things like that; it's because we're afraid, not of or for ourselves, but of and for others. Why is asking someone something so hard to do? They're just words right? Wrong. They mould what we are and how we act. So when you go to say 'I love you,' to that someone whom you do love, think about this; if I chicken out, and I never see them again, will I regret not telling them.

Life is there to be lived. Live it loud and live it proud.

<3 Peace out man.

'How did that happen?'

I served this guy today.
Which is not actually that significant, because I serve hundreds of guys and eventually they all roll into this one ball of guys that I don't seem to register as individuals. But, this is guy was tall and handsome, and decent-looking (I should explain that further; he didn't seem arrogant, or self-assured, he seemed...comfortable) and has this gorgeous smile and he made my bones all want to melt. And that was before I actually served him. He made me laugh out loud, geninue, happy, not-putting-it-on-because-you're-paying-for-food laugh, and I loved that.
I liked it; smiling when he walked away, and smiling as I things over after that.

I guess I'm that place where you're heart isn't broken anymore, it's badly scarred, and scared, to beat again and feel something. I guess, after awhile, my mind kindof looks at a relationship as this thing that was just going to screw up again, make it hurt again, but I think with this guy, whom I'll never see and again and whom won't ever give me a second thought, he'd be able to make it beat, again.

I guess this guy who I'll never see again will never get that he gave me for more than a two dollar coin for four ice-cream cones, he also gave me hope.

The song in which was being played while someone is dying is a song I'd hate to listen to.

So, I watched the Last song yesterday with AddiK, and it was good. It was terribly sad, so of course, people crued. Addi did, and she tried to hide it from me, and I feel bad because I made her feel bad for crying, but as a human being, you have to be very 'tough'(or emotionless) to not cry when Hannah Montanna's dad died. It was sad! And I did have a slight welling of water in my eyes! But then the moment was ruined when I started laughing because I could hear sobs from the audience. Teenage girls...sheesh! It was amusing. So, for people planning to go see Miley Cyrus pout her lips whenever she's not talking, and Liam Hemsworth, or whatever his name is, look deep into her eyes and snog her passionately, then this is the movie for you!

We also went shopping at bankstown, and I bought awesome leather gloves that really don't have a point and cost me a fair amount, but still, they're awesome. I also bought a ring that says 'hópe'from sportsgirl, ans it's supporting people with anorexia and bulemia, and it's for the butterfly foundation, I also got a sexy jumper from (va)jayjays and worked from 5:45 AM to 12.

Farrr out, it was pretty good, but like, the first two hours were soooooooooooo long. Some guy, but I have NO idea who, wrote there number down 'for me' and gave it to my boss to give to me, which made me laugh out loud. Sure, I'm DEFINEATLY going to call you, because I'm totally into *not really, I threw your number in the bin immediately* and then felt bad, because I really wanted to give all my friends your number. hehehe.

Questions.

Yes, I stole this from your blog. IMITATION IS THE BIGGEST FORM OF FLATTERY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1. What are three ways to win your heart?
Cook for me *seriously, the key to my heart is in my stomach*, magic tricks- I know it sounds lame, but the card tricks and the rabbit out of the hat get me every time, and laughter- I love laughing, and if you make me laugh, I love you. It's that simple.

2. Do you like lightning?
Hell to the yes. I want to get one of those freakin' awesome photos.

3. Have you ever cut someone else’s hair?
Ummm, I don't think so.

4. Last person you said ‘i hate you’ to?
Umm, I don't know, Matty? I say it to alot of people, in a joking manner, usually followed by a 'I'm joking, I love you'

5. Rain or sunshine?
Sunshine. It's nicer at the beach when it's sunny.

6. Biggest turn off?
Liars.

7. Fave movie?
I actually have many, including, Star Wars 6, Avatar, and The Longest Yard. Hell to the yes.

9. Would you date someone who smokes?
You're going to die.

10. Would you date someone who was addicted to drugs?
I wouldn't like to.

11. What’s your biggest turn on, physically?
The smile. It melts my insides.

12. Would you have sex w. someone you weren’t dating?
Haha. Depends how drunk I was.

13. Have you ever missed someone and regretted breaking up with them?
I didn't do the breaking.

14. If you could go on ONE DATE with any celebrity, who would it be?
JUSTIN BIEBER!! I'm totally kidding, it'd have to be Lucas Till. He's a spunk.

16. What’s your relationship status?
Single

17. Do you like cuddling?
I lobe cuddles.

18. Do you hold grudges?
No, I'm a softy.

19. Do you regret dating anyone?
Nah, they taught me my lesson.

20. Hugger or kisser?
Bita both, but I love huggles.

21. Missing someone?
Not really.

22. Most important lesson you’ve learned from your exes?
es? Ex. I've learnt that all the wishing in the world won't stop someone from breaking your heart. And that second chances aren't worth it.

23. Are you happier single or in a relationship?
Is it sad that I say the latter?

24. How important are looks?
On my scale, I actually have to be physically attracted to someone before I go 'hmmm, maybe this might work.'

25. Would you rather date someone who was SUPER-HOT or someone who was nice?
I'm so shallow.

26.Do you stay friends w/ the people you’ve dated?
Define Friends?

27. Would you fight over someone you wanted to be with?
Depends on who it is.

28. Do you kiss on the 1st date?
Maybe...

29. If someone cheated on you, would you take them back if you really loved them?
I think that if someone loved you enough, they wouldn't cheat, and no matter how much you love them, they obviously don't love you back enough.

30. Name three things you would not tolerate in a relationship?
Lying, manipulation, and accusations.

33. Which one of your friends do you think would make a good prostitute?
Caitlin.

34. Did you miss anyone today?
Nope.

35. Last person to see you cry?
Dad.

36. Who/what made you cry?
The look.

37. Are you a forgiving person?
I like to hope so.

38. Would you ever share a girl/boyfriend with your best friend?
I don't share guys.

39. Are most of your friends guys or girls?
Girls.

41. How long does it take you to get ready to go out ?
Forever!! I'm so slow! It takes me ages because I get distracted.

42. How many people do you know of named Adam ?
Umm, one!

43. What was the last thing you burnt?
A chip, yesterday, I set it on fire with a candle.

45. What is your full name?
This is the internet. I dun't thunk so.

46. What color is the bra you have on now ?
Red and white.

47. Do you straighten your hair every day?
I think I've only ever straightened my hair like, twice.

48. Do you worry about the size of your boobs?
I don't need to.

49. Are you the typical girl who’s addicted to gossip?
No, not addicted, I just find it amusing.

50. What are your favorite girly magazines?
Girlfriend. It's cute.

51. Did you ever spend all day/night getting pretty for a guy?
Not all day.

52. Did you ever cry during a romantic movie?
Sometimes. I think it depends on how hormonal I am.

53. Would you leave the house without makeup on?
I do all the time.

54. What’s the biggest turn on about guys?
If they're totally ripped. Phwoar.
But, mostly if they make me laugh.

55. Are you a girly-girl, tomboy, or in the middle?
In the middle. Only because I asked Holly and she said so.

56. Is pink truly the best color in the entire universe?
No.

57. What’s the most expensive piece of clothing you own?
Ummmm, I don't know....

58. What color do you absolutely despise?
Hmm, I don't despise any one colour, but a gross pink makes me cringe.

59. Have you ever stolen?
I think I steal pens all the time. It's unintentional, but still.

60. Have you set your hair on fire?
Yes. Science. Year 7. It smells awful.

61. Do you wear sweat pants?
Yeps. Go trakkies.

62. Do you know anyone who has lost their virginity?
Umm, a few.

63. Have you ever ran into a door because you didn’t see it?
A few times.

64. Doesn’t 50 Cent suck?
Fiddi cent. Ch-yer.

65. Do you like hugs and kisses(xoxo)?
nah, xx.

66. Do you act gangster?
All the time. I think it's hysterical.

67. Ever made a prank phone call?
Not really.

68. Last kiss?
Don't want to talk about it.

69. What did you want to be when you were growing up?
An...*insert awesome job here* undecided

72. Favourite NON sexual thing to do at night with a guy?
Talk and watch movies :)

73. When did you first start feeling older?
Not that long ago.

74. Favourite guilty pleasure?
Milo and rafello.

75. What famous person(s) would you like to have dinner with?
Hugh Jackman and Angelina Jolie.

76. What famous person would you like to date?
Aaron Johnson or Alex Pettifer.

78. What do you hate about your school?
The lack of penis's.

79. Last person whose bed you laid in besides your own?
Ummm...I don't remember.

80. Have you lost a friend recently?
Not really.

81. Ever have a sleepover with the opposite sex?
Not really.

82. Do you use smiley faces on the computer a lot?
mhmm :)

83. Is it easier to forgive, or to forget?
to forgive.

84. Do you give out second chances too easily?
Not anymore.

85. Is your best friend pretty?
They all are. Stunningly attractive.

86. Is it awkward when you run into your exes?
not anymore.

87. Have you ever changed clothes in a vehicle?
Yes, I do that all time.

88. Can you make yourself cry?
Sometimes.

89. Is your life simple or complicated?
pretty simple.

90. Are you easily confused?
Yes. Very

92. Are you taller than 5′4″?
Hell to the yes.

93. Have you ever liked someone who treated you like crap?
Yes, I have.

94. Is your current hair colour mostly your natural hair color?
All of it is.

95. Does everything really happen for a reason?
I hope so. If not, all my plotting an scheming will be for nothing.

Zappo.

It's funny how my life is defined by 'before Durras'and 'After Durras' like it's some higher being of spiritual rightness or whatever, haha. It's true though, Durras has become a huge part of my life and I know it sounds cheesy, but I really don't know what I'd do if I didn't have that escape from everyone. It was fun, we (for now, Matt and I) caught some massive waves and I learnt a bit more about bodyboarding from observation and trial-and-error (note; trial and error is defined here as yes...yes...no *dumped*) I love it. There's this...I don't know, power, when you're in the surf. Not you though, the ocean. This force of nature that can bring you down on your knees in seconds. Sets of 8 foot waves would roll in, one after another, while we'd all try desperatly to either catch, or not be killed, by the monsters. But when you do, I always make some huge mistake of not pulling out quick enough, when you're flying through the air for a second before being caught by a crashing wave. Bliss.
I guess it's everything about Durras. How everyone gets along and talks to one another, how much gossip there is. How everyone accepts you for who you are there, not for what you are here. At Durras, it's a clean slate. I love how, one conversation flows to another, and suddenly, you're talking about something completely different. How you can make racist jokes, because we're all white *seriously, we might as well be called KKK :P) But I guess what I love most is the peace that's there. The lazy holiday attitude. I love it.